It is now the second time in two days that I have had an embarrassing and public outbreak of hives. I think it might be the new type of body soap I recently decided to give a try. That or Ebola. Most likely, it's Karma. Here is my list of things I have done recently, which are punishable by hives.
1. I've eaten McDonalds three times this week. Mainly because of their cheeseburgers and chocolate chip cookies. They are fabulous! I love em! This sounds like the early stages of obesity. I will now give them both up as penitence.
2. I cursed...in front of my son Roman. I said, "There is $#!% everywhere!" You see, he had taken his diaper off and there was runny poop all over the tile and on the counter. I overreacted; it's nothing a little bleach and elbow grease couldn't fix. I will take Roman to the park for penitence.
3. I remind myself of Michael Scott from the The Office. Just in general. Most of the time. For penitence, I will...I will... Firm up my resolve. That’s what she said.
Remember, Karma is real. Karma is bigger than you. Karma hates redheads with sensitive skin. So, do something nice right away!
6 comments:
Don't worry Jon, I went to McDonalds twice this week since they were giving away free burritos. It was well worth the Karmic backlash inflicted on my bowels.
Oh no. If we're talking karma...
Jon, I wear a "Mighty Karma" shirt, just to keep karma at bay. I'm wearing it right now!
Karma loves me because I am perfect. BOO-YA!
'Boo-ya', Stef?
so red-heads burn more easily in both senses of the word?
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